keeping the faith.
I hate that I let it happen. I hate the fact that I started believing in something which I know is not true.
I miss those days when I could walk confidently into any situation, and believe that I can handle anything thrown my way. I miss those days when challenges and continuously pushing boundaries excited me. I miss the days when I truly believed in myself.
Yes, my spirit is broken. My self-esteem is at an all-time low. But the worst part of it all is that I started believing the idea that I’m not good enough — and that I will never be good enough. I hate myself for allowing this to happen.
Now I look back and I tell myself that the tears I shed were not worth it. But those hurtful words still haunt me. For everything that I do now, there’s a nagging voice inside my head saying that I’ll fuck it up. And then I would start second guessing myself.
I lost myself in there. I lost the good old “Angel” I once was — the fighter, the challenger. I’ve turned into this empty shell. And I hate that I let it happen. I hate the fact that it got to me. But it’s not too late. Dear God, I hope it’s not.
It can’t go on like this. I can’t live like this. For now I have to rebuild and pick-up the pieces. Grow stronger, be better. If there’s anything that I learned from this experience, is that I will not become like that. I will never be like that. I will coach, groom and push people — but never take away their spirit. I hope what happened to me will serve as a lesson to everyone. Never let anyone tell you you’re not good enough, because you are. Once you start believing in what others say, it’ll be the end of you.
I promise myself I will be better than ever. I will be stronger than before. I just have to keep my chin up and have faith.
people say that patience is a virtue. but sometimes, after you’ve had a bad day, things get on your nerves. it’s what you do when you get ticked off that matters.
sure, there are times when i just want to tackle and strangle him. but then he would do something sweet that would me make want to hug him tight instead.
he gets on my nerves. he tests my patience. and yet with the littlest things, he manages to make me smile and forget about everything. i’m not even sure if he’s aware that he does it.
“just a feeling…”
okay, so i’m still reeling from the recent Maroon 5 concert. but there’s something about this song that struck me the first time i heard it.
intuition is supposed to be a gift to all ladies out there. for some reason, i always do the opposite of what my intuition tells me. maybe it’s the rebel in me. but not doing so has ended up with me in tears and my heart broken into pieces.
don’t get me wrong, i’m absolutely happy right now. but the song reminded me of all the times i got my heart broken. i guess the memory of the pain never leaves you. the pain may fade, but the memory of it will always be there.
Asked by tumblrbot tumblrbot
WHERE WOULD YOU MOST LIKE TO VISIT ON YOUR PLANET?
that place where i can fly and be free.
“bottomline is, someone stops trying…”
relationships take a lot of hard work and happiness is a choice. choose to be happy. choose to stay inlove. choose to fall out of it. choose to be the victim. choose to be the fighter. choose to stay in it. choose to run away.
if there’s one thing i learned from my mistakes, it’s about not letting go of how you felt the first time he made your heart skip a beat and why you chose to take that leap. at the end of the fairytale, it’s not about winning the battle but getting a happy ever after.
**it’s the video that made me want to write again.
funny how little random things can greatly impact the way we view life.
first post. yey!
this is my page. it’s not business-related, it’s personal. i’ll post what i feel, i’ll post what i think and not because i’m told to do so.
these are the musings of a hopeful realist. and no, i’m not emo.
NIGHTNIGHT by DEDDY
